Monday, April 21, 2008

Sugasm #128

Sub lyn courtesy of Long-Distance Sub.
--------------------------------------------------

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #129? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.


This Week’s Picks

Fellatrices: C-u-n-n-i-l-i-n-g-u-s

“Yep, sounds like the boyfriend needs a lesson,” she affirmed. “You just need to show him where to lick.”

In Plain Sight

“She was laughing flirtatiously and he had a look of a cat that’s about to get the cream.”

Succor.

“The act of suspension removed me from my ego and placed me at the still point.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults)

Ten Things to Thank Porn For

Editor’s Choice

Half-Nekkid Thursday: My Hustler Debut

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

BDSM & Fetish

Bath time…
The Edge
Fetish Friday - Shoes
Figging and Coat Hanger Spanking
Half-Nekkid in Tighty Whities
“HIS Good Girl!”
Phone sex and the belt
Sexual narratives
Silence
Sugarbutch Star: Shannon

Sex News, Reviews & Interviews

Dirty Girls: an interview with Rachel Kramer Bussel
Essen Fetish Evolution Weekend 2008
Jenna’s Velvet G-Spot Vibrator Review
Top Ten Sex Toys To Laugh At

NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio

Blonde MILF gets stuffed in ass in Gangbang
Carla Bruni Nude Pictures Worth $91000
Divinity
Jana Jordan & Lena Nicole
Lady Dalbin at the Crazy Horse in Paris
Pornsaint Jasmine Tame
Sapphic Erotica
Video Blue Line Cinema

Erotic Writing and Experiences

The Allure
B is for Bukkake
Captivating the college girl-Part III
Getting In Touch With Myself
Giving Out Candy
In Dreams There Are No Limits Part II
Miss Take Charge
Night terrors.
A Party Primer
Pushing The Right Buttons
Speedos removed - orgy with the boys
The Steam Room - An Erotic Tale
Surreality in Dreams
An Unavoidable Mistake
Verbal Domination, Verbal Cruelty (part 2)
The Waitress

Sex Work

The Taboo Fantasy Of Max Mosley

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships

Bed Tango
Choices
Has Gay lost its magic charm?
Just Like Porn! …but not.
Nazi Fantasies
New Jersey Fish Mouth
Not just another pretty face.
On (some) Radical Feminist approaches to studying
Sexual Assault; My Story.
Trimmed
The YouTube Divorce? Oh, No, You Did Not

................
...

Thursday, April 17, 2008

A Damaged Girl

This week, I came upon a moving entry from one of my favorite bloggers who I recently found, CCG at Confessions of a College Callgirl.

She spoke about a subject in her post entitled "Sick and Sad" which is close enough to my heart to have nearly ripped it from my chest.

The above is a piece of my original photo-art, entitled, of all things, "Damaged Girl".
------------------------------------------------------------------------------


She, like I, was wounded at a young age with abuse and has all of her life lent upon the unsteady flow of attention from men to keep her bruised ego floating on the surface of her problems. She wrote the most touching blog entry which got me thinking in a far more personal way (as if my sexual life weren't personal enough) than I usually do for this blog. She, in many ways, is my mirror image.

Even with all of the joy in my life and even though I know I'm living the life I was meant to, it still mangles my heart when I think of all of the sorrow I've endured on the way to my life now. My life is beautiful most of the time, but there's still pain.

I have been the first to admit that Im a severely wounded person. Physically, emotionally, chemically, sexually and all other ways possible. Its been a hard road to the point of understanding that not everything in life is supposed to be like the beautiful films they make in Hollywood.

My mother told me that in life you can be and do anything you want to in life and that happiness is everywhere you look; the next day I was raped, and all this at only age thirteen.

I feel like I have to put up colored screens in front of my emotions, just so people will like me. I'm the sunny girl that everyone knows who would do just about anything for a friend. I bake cookies and cakes and sing and dance and act and paint. I smile and giggle and walk with a bounce that makes my ponytail sway and sometimes I want to hurl myself off of the 17th Street Causeway Bridge and drown.

The charade can only go on for so long before it begins to break.

Its hard to be so honest and dark when every waking hour is spent trying to convince yourself that everything is ok.

I've tried to keep this blog light and sexy and carefree because thats what people want to read...right?

I'm and intelligent, loving, pretty, education oriented young woman and God help me when my mind starts to stray to the sadder parts of my memory banks. I've spent so much time and energy doing things that increase my self-formed conception of my eality and it hurts so much to know that most of my self esteem has been rested in the palms of the countless strangers I've allowed to sully the sanctity of my body.

A glance from a man I'll never see again has meant more than any platitude given to me by a best friend. Its such an awful circle. I don't give compliments easily because somewhere I have the sick misconception that somehow it will deplete my stores of the ego bolstering compliments I myself have received.

Think of all the moments I'll never get back because of my insecurity about my body, my perception of my levels of popularity and desire. My thoughts mirror those of CCG's so closely that it aches far too much to even go back over what she's posted so I can relate my own side on all of it.

All of my relationships have been made in an effort to kindle the never-ending longing for love and companionship Ill never truly feel because deep down I loathe all men because I've seen their most brutal and disturbing side in the faces of nameless criminals who have defiled and bruised me. How could I love someone who resembles my biggest nemesis?

I seduce all of my male friends to give them just a taste that will keep them at my side like weeping puppies, jut for the satisfaction it gives me. The most fearful part of this detail is that its become a sad addiction of sorts, completely beyond my control, like a subconscious neural reflex. I hurt them first so they don't have the chance to hurt me back, and so continues the vicious circle of insane reciprocity.

I hope that somehow and in some way that eventually I'll find a way to cull these pains, but until then I wander ceaselessly like a love-starved infant. How can I start to build my own identity outside of the unfulfilling momentary acceptance I get from countless, meaningless exchanges?

With each glance and with each fumbled tryst I lose more and more of myself, where will it end, if ever?

.........
...

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Just Like Porn! ...but not.

I feel like a dirty slut when I think about those internet porn surfers who find my blog while searching for more explicit material, sometimes making it a happy accident, but the issue is this; this isn't really porn (and PS, the dirty slut thing isn't the problem).

WARNING:

Outside my favorite seedy neighborhood adult store.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

I do indeed agree that it is "pornographic in nature", but this is only because the English language has this usage as the most easily understandable considering my site's subject matter. I wish I could just say that its "erotic writing and memoirs, photographs", but of course the grand mentality of the human populace would just say "So its porn."

Ahhh! It's very complicated.

My overall goal is not to be "Billy Bob's" midnight jack-off (but don't feel bad if it is) but to be an honest, open and well-written source for people to be able to find quality erotic prose about real events in a girl's life. I love the added photos that I take because it adds visual interest (lets face it, the internet is a [mostly] visual interface), sets a mood and lets me do my exhibitionist thing while also letting me be artistic with a hobby of mine.

I love to hear from readers about whatever really, compliments, critiques, relation, life story. I like feeling that other people enjoy and understand what I write, that they see my view point. I'm not trying to be over the top, or more than I am.

If I wanted to do that I would have stayed in Hollywood and gotten into being a porn star.

Every emotion and experience needs an outlet, this is mine, even if it is intensely public and extremely personal. I enjoy it. Popularity isn't a huge thing with me, but I like that I have been able to reach a large number of people.

In my everyday life I'm a very constant, responsible individual who is mostly interested in furthering her own intelligence and life experience. I've gone through a lot and mostly thats due to my own doing, to launching myself out there into the big bad world and into the arms of many people. This doesn't and has never diminished my self worth.

Here's something I want to know however: do most people distinguish the subtle differences? Can they? Whats in your cranium regarding this matter?

Am I just a lusty chick who can't tell the difference between severe perversion and a bit of erotic writing and journaling?

I'm living a life that I know is a good and exciting and enthralling one while not truly meaning to be well.....por-ny. Lucky you that I write it all up for you, right? :)

..........
...

Monday, April 07, 2008

Sugasm #126

Vanessa courtesy of Badgirl’s Hotbox.
--------------------------------------------------------------

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #127? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.


This Week’s Picks

Up Your Bum

“Now, every mainstream porn film seems to include anal sex as part of the sequence”

A Moment Captured

“Right now I am looking out down at the street from my window and my fingers have found their way to my soft wet labia.”

Things Every Man Should Own/Know/Hear

“You can also give the controller to her, or use it yourself, and play with the power of the vibrations.”


Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults)

The New York Times’ Best Porn Articles

Editor’s Choice

Feminist Carnival of Sexual Freedom and Autonomy #1

More Sugasm

Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

BDSM & Fetish

Coming Over

Counting the days

How Much Pain Can You Take?

Kinkfest 2008 Report

Need - Part II.

Piss off

Pride Cometh

The Punishment List - F/m Spanking Video

Spanking and wanking

Subordinate, me


Thoughts on Sex and Relationships

Fear of Rejection

Let’s talk about being bi

Sally Kern Does NOT Speak For Me (Redux)

When it all went horribly wrong…

Why I Enjoy Public Sex

Why Marriage?


NSFW Pics, Videos & Audio


Blonde MILF is pounded hard in Gangbang

Grenian | Cikita

Pornsaint Nico Elise

Sexy Brunette Domino

Vanessa - Flower Power


Sex News, Reviews & Interviews

April Is Orgasm Month!

Catalina loves The Bondage Awards


Chanta Rose Dominates Mz. Berlin And Sabrina Fox On Chanta’s Bitches

eXcessica! (Calling All Writers…)

Fetish Model Wenona In Predicament and Suffocation Bondage on Water Bondage

Kicking Consent at Podophila

Some Positive News for Camgirls

Spray-On Condom in a Can

Weighting for a Great CBT Toy


Sex Work

The Dirty Nasty Truth

One Week Later…

The Porn Dilemma - Sometimes Forums Make Me Mad


Erotic Writing and Experiences

Captivating the college girl part two

Crush

Filling her up with my fingers

Garden Variety

Mine

My New York Indiscretion: The Conclusion

Twisted Tongue Dreams and Tongue Twister Scenes


.............

...

Thursday, March 27, 2008

My New York Indiscretion: The Conclusion


This is the concluding chapter of a three part memoir. To catch up on whats transpired so far, here are the links: Part One & Part Two

The chill from the outdoors somehow permeates my skin as my mind races, his hands all over me, his lips against my skin.


I've found forbidden passion and though a million consequences lie ahead of me, I'm resolved to sin.

Pearls again; and this time with some double-time style.
-----------------------------------------------------


Aaden's fingertips are rough on my thighs as he rubs them up and down my legs, his mouth working on that secret explosion of ecstasy. I give in completely when his wet, warm tongue snakes in between the valley between my thigh and my kitten. I slip my hands around me on the silky counterpane like I'm making snow angels, my mind gently falling in rhythm to the physical pleasure overwhelming me.

I feel a small wave of my orgasmic energy come upon me and I shudder softly, my eyes slamming shut and my neck stretching seemingly of its own will. My body tenses as I begin to pant, my breathing becoming erratic, heat in every expulsion.

I whimper loudly as if showing my white flag of defeat, and my whole countenance is disturbed when Aaden's head pops up, his eyes meeting mine.

At my look of severe shock and disappointment, he chimes in softly,

"I have other ways, much better ways. Just hold on." He smiles devilishly as he climbs on the bed next to me, my face showing my displeasure.

He grabs my hand, squashing it to the counterpane, his mouth hot and desirous as I whimper under him for release. His arms are all strength and heft when he repositions me on the bed on my side, my back to him. I turn my shoulders and face to look at him and when he impales me slowly from behind, I hold on to my composure, staring into his eyes defiantly and sighing heavily.

He rocks into a rhythm and all the while he holds onto my shoulder with one hand and my hip against him with the other. I'll have bruises for a week in both places, but for now its bliss as I feel him completely overpowering me.

I lose myself in the ecstasy and the rush of it, him pounding into me all the while. He whispers in my ear throatily,

"I knew I had to have you, and here we are. Are you my little prize? My conquest?"

I moan audibly and I'm captivated.

I shout out, "Yes. Yes. Yes."

Im at the peak of delirium from not having been let to come and I'm angry with it bottled inside of me. It's a god-send when the hand holding my hip close to him comes around, his fingers stroking me in motion with his rhythm. My hands grip at the counterpane as I whimper uncontrollably, spouting nonsense, colors raging neon in my brain.

Its like a white hot snake finally when I come, its force exhausting me to the point that I don't realize that he's already come and is cradling me against his chest. His voice is soft as he speaks but its lost on me, I'm gone and all I can think of is that whatever bullshit I may face due to this little indiscretion; Its worth it completely.

---------------------------------------------------

The next morning when I wake up he has coffee in the pot and is lying in box shorts next to me with a cup of it, and offering me a sip he smiles like a bandit whose just scored his loot.

I'm tired down to my soul and angry that the sun had to come out to play today.

The drive back to my hotel is quiet but sweet, as he holds my hand, commenting every now and then. I'm just sort of out of myself and wanting to get back to my friends, to have some breakfast and enjoy the rest of the trip. I hold no attachment and even feel a soft sort of repulsion, like I have to just say goodbye and have done with it.

He lingers on the sidewalk with me and kisses me softly on the lips and then once on the forehead until I break hands with him and walk into the hotel without looking back. It's not like I'm not into him, but to be truthful, I'm just done with him.

He was sweet but now his time was through with.

...................
...

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Good-Bye, Gadget (?)

Just shy of two years, it looks like its the end of my relationship with Gadget.

It's all come down to this because of myriad of reasons and honestly, it shouldn't have drug on this long with so many problems going unresolved.

Gadget and I in bed in the good times.
-----------------------------------------------------------


I think it all came down to being annoyed, agitated, and belittled far too much and on a far too recurrent basis. Gadget is one of those people who have come from nearly abject poverty and have built themselves up from it into a productive member of society.

He follows the status quo far too closely and pushes and heaves at everyone to do to the same...even if they have not asked for such assistance. In a word, he believes that no one is ever good enough and should always be pushing at their individual glass-ceilings. That works for some people but thats just not me.

Gadget is going to be 27 this summer and maybe he feels as if he has not got much time left to prove himself a man in the world. As for myself, Im a 20 year old college student/writer/waitress who is just in the beginning of her wave of adulthood and just wants to have fun, have a few lazy days between her break-neck work days and try to find who she is.

He likes to push me and make me out to have more problems than I do; maybe it makes him feel better about himself if he has someone he can look down upon.

My best friend (a gay male) (I only drop the fact that he's gay to let you all know he's not after me and therefore not giving me bum advice to get me single again) has told me that perhaps Gadget feels inferior to me and therefore has to build himself up and belittle me, all at the same time to make himself feel worthy, and especially not below me, in status and mind power. I feel theres a grain of truth in this.

I have grown to hate the way he acts, the way he deals with problems and how he never feels enough is enough. I feel like he doesn't make enough time for me and when I encounter problems his only advice is to "just let it go". I wish it wasn't so though, because even for all his misgivings, he's a good man who I know only has everyone's best interests at heart but who needs to be much more empathetic, less judgmental and above all, more understanding of the flawed nature of man.


Update: 3 days later and I'm still waiting for the pain and the tears...where are they? Will they ever come? I suppose its just as well to leave something without childish emotion following me. Would it be better though?

Update: A week later: Is this the right thing? Is loneliness worth it? Should the negatives override all of the positives? I'm just so torn.
................
...

Monday, March 10, 2008

Sugasm #122

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #123? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.

This Week’s Picks
Sex and love; anger and appeasement
“And in some way, the love I had for him will never be extinguished entirely.”

The Tetrised Luggage
“Our thighs are touching and I can feel him inch forward in his seat.”

You never know who we are
“People tend to have an idea of who can/does talk about sex.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself (one from the vaults)
The Media vs. Pornography

Editor’s Choice
Red Assed Mouthsoaping for His Lies

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

Erotic Writing and Experiences
My New York Indiscretion: Part Two

............
...

Thursday, March 06, 2008

My New York Indiscretion: Part Two

To read part one, click here: My New York Indiscretion

So after battling with life for a while and also with the consequences of my actions in NYC, I decided to sit down and finish the story. One thing to note is this; I don't regret anything.



Now for part two of my New York tryst:


Going all out for my art.
-----------------------------------------------


The night around me was too quiet and the plan too fixed. I have a torrent of images, words, emotions flooding through me and I couldn’t settle on just one; my mind was out of touch. I could hear the soft buzz of the music coming from the speakers in the car and I could see a million little pin-points of light on either side of me and the dark murky stretch of the Hudson to my right. Aaden smiled down at me when I took a quick peek at him, his eyes impressive in the darkness.

I bite my nail, nearly breaking it in my nervousness. You would think that by now a reasonable person would have made the proper judgment call and would have decided to go back to their own bed alone.

The breaks squeak a little as he presses down on the break peddle, the car coming to a soft stop and a lump forming in my throat. I watch him as he comes around the front of the car, and hear the gentle click in the door as he opens it for me. His hand is strength on mine as I stand and he gathers me up, winter cold all around us and heat between our lips. He takes my hand and wrapping it around his arm, he leads me towards the red brick building looming ahead of us.

The elevator is a scary place because it offers a temporary seclusion which could lead to dangerous things. He eyes me like candy and my expression is that of availability. I let out a squeak as he slams me against the inside of the elevator, his calm veneer gone and his animal slowly leaking out. His mouth is strength and need against mine and when he kisses down my face to nuzzle my neck as he presses me hard against the wall, I moan out painfully in need, forgetting my moral dilemma. I bite down on my lip as he reaches between my legs, bringing my thigh up against him, pushing against me, forcing me to become painfully aware of my wetness.

The elevator dings, bringing us back to the knowledge that we aren’t in private…yet.

I admire New Yorkers their drive to live in such a manic city but I do not envy the seemingly overkill display of locks on their doors.

The locks click, click, click, my feet tired and my mind racing, my kitten starving.

At once I’m pulled into his apartment, distinguished male scents surrounding me. He helps me off with my coat, hanging it in a closet just inside the entryway. I gently walk the expanse of the living room over to the window, surveying a view that is supremely New York; the dead scraggly trees randomly dotting the sidewalk and the endless parade of car cutting through the city streets.

Warm, strong arms wrap around me and pull me back to my current need, Aaden’s lips gracing my neck as he talks softly to me,

“So did you imagine this is what your New Year’s Eve getaway would be like?”

I’m sly when I twist around in his arms to face him,

“It’s certainly different that I imagined, maybe better, maybe not. I suppose its all perspective.”

He smiles and kisses me, my not-so-romance-novel answer probably shocking him. His big hands settle on my hips and he nuzzles his face in my hair, his cheek next to mine,

“Though not the answer I was looking for, I can take that one and store it. I can do something to make it fun for now anyway.”

I stretch out my back like a cat as I reach my arms up and around his next, kissing him like my last breath was inside of him. He’s very old-world-Hollywood as he tangles his hands in my hair, holding my head as he kisses me, his other hand exploring my bottom with fervent interest.

I step back from him during a lull in a kiss and pull my shirt over my head, standing in jeans and my bra before him. I un-button my jeans as I take a few steps backward and sit daintily on the edge of the couch, sliding my high heels off and curling my feet underneath me.

He advances slowly, taking off his suit jacket and lying it over a chair, and then making quick work of the buttons of his shirt. As he comes within my reach I grab his belt buckle, sliding the belt out of it, hearing those series of clicks; my favorite sound. I pull the belt from around his waist and throw it down, sliding my fingers to the delightful bulge in his pants, smoothing my palm over him, feeling his hardness and glancing up at him at intervals.

I pull on his pants to bring him closer and start to undo his fly, his voice floods the room,

“Are you sure you don’t want to go first?”

His voice is slathered in desire and I can sense he’s teetering on the edge of his control,

“Oh yes.”

I pull down his pants just enough to find the object I’m searching for and begin by luxuriantly smoothing my hand around his shaft. He lets his head fall back slightly, calming himself and yet letting go. I bring my face close to his body, lying my cheek against his hip, my lips mere centimeters from him. I take in his smell, and the warmth of him, letting him work himself up.

I look up at him as I gently flick his head with the tip of my tongue, his face is filled with what I’d describe as delightful pain and urgency. In a mere moment I let the length of him slide into my mouth, moaning at the pleasure of it in sync with him. I wrap my right hand around the bottom of his shaft and gently sucking on him, I hold onto his hip. He’s in a world all his own, stealing peeks down at me, my eyes cutting his glance from below. I savor each moment, each sensation as my tongue and mouth explore him, his taste driving me on to want that final explosion.

His voice is not as steady as it had been moments before,

“If you don’t stop now I won’t have anything left for you.”

He pulls away gently and sits down next to me, gathering me up and bombarding me with his mouth to mine, his hand running from my neck to my breasts, down my stomach to caress my thigh, strength in every movement. I’m all sighs and undulation as he pulls me up from the couch and into the bedroom, his hand tight around my small wrist.

The bed is high and perfect for the little ideas that keep popping into my head. The height is just perfect for bending a bad little girl over it and spanking her roughly before sliding into her wet kitten just to show her whose boss.

I’m pulled from my thoughts by the view of him kneeling in front of me, peeling my jeans off with the aid of his mouth at the fly. His mouth is heat on my hip as he wraps his arms around my waist, and burrowing his face into my kitten, my thin panties can barely restrain his attentions.

I slide backwards onto the bed at his direction and his movements are smooth and practiced when he slides my panties down my hips and over my legs to lie on the floor. He presses the length of his body full against mine, wrapping my legs around him. I grind against him, his excitement alarmingly noticeable even through thick wool pants.

I moan quietly to myself as he grabs hold of my wrists and holds them down hard against the bed, his teeth at my neck. He bites gently there and applies kisses too. I squirm underneath him and feel my slick kitten against the rough wool of his pants.

I squirm some more.

He trails his hands down my body, pressing down on me, scratching almost and when he reaches my kitten he takes one finger and gently runs the tip of it from back to front, wetting his finger and eliciting a long moan from me. He holds my thighs hard against the bed, restraining me as he dips is face near my kitten, and nuzzling his lips against me, he gently licks at me, stroking the wetness between my lips. My hips buck without warning and when I feel his lips around my clit, I can't imagine holding out for much longer. Its sublime and devious.

I bite my finger and thank god that it's only just beginning.


TO BE CONTINUED...

...........

...

Friday, February 22, 2008

Out of the Teens

This morning at 9 am I turned 20 years old and have had to wave goodbye to my teens.

Relaxation.
-------------------------------------------

I feel a dueling set of emotions right now as I've never been one of those teens that always wanted to grow up. I feel that in many ways my life is just beginning and so many things are ahead of me and yet I can't help but feel a little nostalgia for all the memories my teens hold.

Goodbye teen aged coquette, hello twenty-something seductress.

............
...

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Sugasm #115

The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #116? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form.

This Week’s Picks

Debauched nothings
“You promised me you’d give me your cock.”

Sex Trophies
“Inside the drawer are two pair of panties.”

Who gets to talk about sex?

“I was thinking the other day about who gets to talk about sex and sexuality.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Cashback

Editor’s Choice
The houseboy’s rebellion

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm


Erotic Writing and Experiences

About Chantal, now…
CyberGirl goes beyond amazing
Lady Chatterley’s Ruf
My New York Indiscretion
Off on the right foot
Table Top
Tonia (Part 2)
The Train
Valentine.
Walking Home In Her Panties

.........
...

Thursday, January 17, 2008

My New York Indiscretion

As the neon twisted around me it seemed like one of those perfect moments that just make your life worth all the hardship and annoyance.

It was midnight and it was ecstatic; like nothing you’ve ever experienced. Everyone in Times Square was feeding off of one another’s energy and it just became a veritable orgy of the senses.

5 – 4 – 3 – 2- 1 – HAPPY NEW YEAR!

The four of us girls in Times Square; the day after the mayhem.

---------------------------------------------

His kiss was like fire and ice all at the same time, the cold of his lips attacked by the icy weather and the warm fount that was his mouth. His hand wrapped around the back of my head, tangled in my hair, held me when I thought I might faint and his arm around my waist made me his. My morality couldn’t catch up with me in enough time to save my fragile conceptions of wrong and right; this kiss was like a tidal wave and I knew the aftermath would be the most deviant and orgiastic mistake of my life.

-------------------------------------------------

He says he grew up in the Bronx and he’d seen people die and had to walk in the middle of the street so he wouldn’t get jumped on a daily basis and yet his eyes were soft and yielding as if he only wanted all that he could find that would make life all the better. Aedan was our driver, my three girlfriend’s and mine on our spontaneous road trip up to NYC to see the big ball drop. When I saw him, all bundled up in a black wool trench coat and his black rimmed glasses on, he was all security and fantasy rolled into one, I thought to myself,

“Oh God, how am I going to deal with this?”

--------------------------------------

On New Year’s Eve in the afternoon the Lincoln pulled up and there he was, I knew I was going to end up in a whole lot of trouble considering Gadget was back at home playing Guitar Hero all alone at home.

Aedan opened our doors for us as I looked him up and down, I judged him to be about forty-five; he had lightly gelled back light brown hair and one of those too-attractive-to-be-real faces and yet he wasn’t cocky at all. He ferried us around Manhattan all during the early afternoon until the middle of the afternoon when all the streets in the city were closed down due to the good old ball drop. All day he kept this tight leash on me and never really let me slip out of his sight, now and then securing us as we walked along bustling streets. At lunch we downed three bottles of Moet collectively and conversation slipped to the more taboo. Liz reaches across the table and points at Aedan,
"So what do you think about Petite? She’s a pretty hot little number, don’t you think?"

Her giggling reached a peak with the other’s as my cheeks grew a fiery pink. Aedan smiled a little embarrassedly and then took my hand which was on the table next to his,

“I think she’s a lovely little thing.”

With a wink and a look he kissed my hand and the heat from his lips radiated throughout my whole body. The girls’ faces were stunned but he didn’t look away from my eyes or drop my hand but instead, tucked it underneath his against his coat, pulling my face towards his, and just as I thought he would kiss me, he tilted his lips toward my ear,

“If I weren’t such a controlled Irish gentleman, you would be in ecstasy right now alone with me in some dark place.”

At moments like this one I always think: 'Why do men always choose me to reveal their innermost thoughts and urges?'

I bit my lip as he pulled away and the girls were all in a tizzy to know what he had said, I only brushed them off by saying,

“I’ll never tell….”

When he brought the car around and opened my door, I don’t think I was imaging that his body got a little too close to mine; a little too close and it was a little too pleasurable.

Soon enough it was ten o’clock and time to try and navigate through the hell of a mob that had congregated around and in Times Square. He let us off near as he could to the square and went off probably to pay hundreds of dollars an hour to park in a reserved parking spot in a nearby garage. We wiggled our way, the four of us holding hands as Liz held onto to a bottle of Chandon, though the crowd.

We met some abrasive characters but by the end of it we had secured a pretty nice spot in the mire of all the people around us. We started to get worried about Aedan since it had taken us nearly forty minutes to connive our way through the masse of people, how would he get to us in time? In about as much time it had taken us to get to the center, Aedan popped up somehow magically behind me. The four of us shouted in a chorus of girly glee, but no one as much as me.

We stomped our feet for the next twenty minutes to keep the cold at bay and soon it was the witching hour.

You really can’t understand how incredible it is to in it all unless you’ve experienced it yourself. Its like all the little light bulbs in everyone’s heads went off and everyone becomes completely on the brink of insanity. I was so wrapped up in it all at about ten minutes until midnight that I hardly noticed Aedan wrapping his arms around my waist.

The countdown was on and my girlfriends and I were looking at each other and at the sparkling ball and yelling at the top of our lungs the numbers all the way down. The last thing I remember is getting the screamed sentiment of “HAPPY” out of my mouth before Aedan whipped me around and had his lips on mine like a torrent of fire.

The fateful kiss had been made.

When at last he pulled his lips from mine, he looked down at me and said,

“I’ve wanted to do that for hours.”

He smiled and hugged me hard against him as my girlfriends looked on in surprised and pleased awe. Have you noticed that your friends will look on your immorality with encouragement in the hopes of you “having fun” but they’re not doing the same as you are? It was kind of like that.

--------------------------------------------

It was about three am by the time we got back to our hotel owing to the most insane traffic I’ve ever seen in my life. The entire car ride I was waging a moral battle with myself in my mind over what to do. The whole ride Aedan was looking at me in that way men do when they think they’ve secured the prize and I couldn’t help but to admit it to myself that he as right. All it would take for me to jump off the edge of decision would be a word from him.

As he pulled to a stop in front of our hotel he put his hand on mine as it rested on my thigh and looked into my eyes,

“Come into the city with me, I have something amazing to show you.”

I only nodded and though my friends protested when I told them I’d be back later, my decision was set; I was leaping off the edge.

We drove on in the night, along the Hudson and near the George Washington Bridge and he told me as we drove though a huge stone brick arch that we were coming up to the Fort on the river.

He parked the car and when he let me out I was gifted with the most outrageous view of the city from one of the highest (natural) points in the area. The fireworks going off still in every direction in the distance combined with the lights from the city were just mind blowing. I sat down on the stone wall at the edge of the hill and just looked at him,
“You know why I agreed to come out here with you, don’t you?”

He smiled and nodded as he took slow steps toward me. He put his gloved hands on my face and looked at me gently,

“Somehow you just have me in this sort of crazy mind-fuck and I can’t help but think perverted thoughts.”

I laughed out loud and he quieted my laughter by kissing me slowly and passionately. His hands were powerful and yet still yielding as he cradled my face. I unbuttoned his coat and wrapped my arms around his body, my hands feeling the softness of his suit and tight, strength of his body. Our kissing became more fevered until at once he lifted his face from mine and breathily said,

“Not here, let’s go to my place. I can really treat you to something there.”

He took my hand as we walked back to the car and I just let myself slip from all my worry into a state of calm and acceptance; I had sinned this much, why no go the full way?

TO BE CONTINUED.....

...............
...

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Happy 2008!

I love when I hear that I'm history just because my life has caught me up and I havn't gotten a chance to post my memoirs in a while. It gives me fuel to prove you wrong.

I'll start off this new year with a juicy post of my New Year's Eve festivities in NYC.

Lets just say it'll have to do with 4 champagne drinking girlfriends, a hot ass private driver (who may or may not have gotten a taste of yours truly) and the Big Apple on flames in neon all around us. Just wait and see - I think you'll be quite pleased.

Update: January 11th - The first half of he memoir is all finished so I'm just waiting for next Thursday!

COMING SOON!
.......
...

Thursday, October 25, 2007

Disobedience

This is a departure from what I'm used to writing and posting for this blog but I hope the BDSM erotica fans out there will enjoy this little fantasy.


I think I need a little help with these...

-------------------------------------------------

Her eyes lit with a moment of clarity and wit and her mouth burst with its gift of intonation and sass to tempt his sadistic side,

“Touch me.” She said, simply and with force. Not at all like Master wanted her to ever raise her voice toward him and she knew it.

She wiggled her ass behind her like an expectant puppy, feeling the soft silk of her panties against her skin. The way her breathing felt so keen when she had her posture collar on made her feel very bold, instead of restricting her behavior like it should have.

His strong hand whipped back, the leash attached to the collar encircling her delicate neck pulling her head up and forward in a flash. The sinews in her neck stretched painfully taut as her Master’s breath settled warm in her wincing face as he began to speak. A subtle choking sensation kept her from crying out as he glared into her disobedient eyes.

“My dove" he said tightly, "why would Master listen to such an impertinent command from those cherry red lips and when given in such disrespect?”

She wiggled, her eyes wide with expectation as she listened to him. She knew she dared not to try and utter a sound. His grip on the leash cinched a few more inches as she winced in soft pain.

“You know that when your body feels an urge, all you must do is get on your dainty little knees, crawl toward Master and beg him to give attention to your wanton body. Haven’t I taught you anything?”

She nodded as a tear squeezed from one eye, all of her energy focused on the points of pain on her body; her knees against the hard, cold ground, her aching neck and windpipe that were stretched to their limits from being hoisted up towards Master’s face by her collar and leash. His words settled in her mind and she reprimanded herself for such a slip of impertinence.

“I’m going to teach you a lesson, my little kitten.” His words were like daggers as he dropped the tension on the leash and unhooked it from her collar. He ordered her to walk on her knees to the other side of the room and crawl back toward him with all of her grace. As she crawled gingerly toward him, her hips sauntering from side to side, her mind concocted versions of her punishment to come with a lingering yet fearful satisfaction.

“Good, my kitten. Now kneel up and rest your pretty little face against Master’s thigh and whisper to me with all of your most beautiful words so that I’ll forgive you and take the time to ravish your body.” She smiled inside while her face displayed utter respect and rapt attention.

As she lent forward, placing the side of her face against the muscular thigh hidden beneath his coarse pants she looked up into his eyes, truly feeling her place in the world. She breathed in deeply of his musky scent that was all at once warm and sweet and familiar. How many times had she been at his feet like this? Countless memories came to mind.

She smiled up at him with the most adoring expression; she couldn’t help but to feel happy even in the midst of waiting for her punishment. Her voice was soft and sweet and full of love when she spoke,

“Oh my Master, I’m so sorry for breaking protocol and letting my horrible side show through. I only felt such lust inside of me that I couldn’t keep it bottled anymore. I want you every moment of day and it hurts so much.’ She rubbed her cheek lovingly against his thigh, ‘Please forgive me for making you angry, I didn’t mean to and I’ll try to be better.” She closed her eyes as she savored every sensation she felt; emotional and physical.

He reached down and gently forced his thumb into her mouth, gripping her bottom jaw as he raised her eyes within his line of sight, the anger gone from his face,

“Yes poppet, I forgive you and if only you didn’t have such large eyes I would be able to stay mad at you longer like you deserve. Now let me know what you’re feeling that you can’t keep it bottled anymore.” Even his questions were commands; her body shuddered with anticipation. His voice never grew soft but only more controlled. He released her jaw so that she could speak,

“Thank you Master.” She leant down and kissed his shoe softly and lingeringly. She knew to never hold back what she was thinking in a situation like this and her voice was lit with passion when she spoke again,

“I only want for you to possess me and make me cry out for you. I want you to be inside of me. Please take me Master. Please. Please Master.” Her last word was filled with a sigh of pure frustration and need.

She rubbed against him like a satisfied cat as she brought herself more fully up on her knees. His hand reached down and gripped a fistful of her hair, exerting pressure so she was forced to stand.

She lent her head against his shoulder as he held her against him, her hair falling over her face and contentment spreading over her. His fingers wrapped themselves around the back of her neck, pressing her collar into her skin and bringing her lips closer to his. His lips moved like small wings so close to hers as he spoke,

“You’ll never hit the peak of my displeasure as long as you live but you watch your sassy mouth because next time I may not be as willing to fall to my own desires and spare you.” He bit her bottom lip softly and she swooned passively and relied on his arms to carry her weight. She was rapt under his machinations and nothing could pry her away now.

His lips shocked hers with intolerable warmth when they met, his motions at once strong and domineering. She made soft cooing sounds as he took her mouth savagely and with much pleasure. His big strong arms wrapped around her body, the strength of his hands nearly hurting her in his passionate embrace.

Sugasm #103

This Week’s Picks

Urgent
“Feel the electricity from my fingers as I peel the damp cotton of your panties away from your sex, as I ease them to one side.”

The Man From Del Monte Says…Yes, Yes, Oh God! YESSS!
“She let her lips and tongue explore me all over.”

Traveling the road, Sharing a load, Side by side

“I guess this is not very sexy, my ranting about politics while playing with your cock.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
The US Constitution Erotic Coloring Book

Editor’s Choice

Dinner Date: Part 1

BDSM & Fetish
Disobedience


More Sugasm

Join the Sugasm

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Nobel Peace Prize?

If Al Gore thinks he deserves the Nobel Peace Prize, he can kiss my environmentalist ass



I mean well, where to start....never mind, if I get started now, I'll never stop. At least its a shared one.....

BTW: I know some of you will want to have words at me, but feel free. :)

Have a good weekend and stay tuned for next week's steamy post and a brand new photo!

(Sorry for leaving the last one two weeks running as featured post, but I just loved it so much!)

........
....

Monday, October 01, 2007

Sugasm #99

Since Sugasm started its whole "let's have featured articles and not just in categories" thing, I'd begun to feel very left out from never being chosen.

All that has been changed when I found out I had been chosen as Editor's Choice for my "Letter to a Lover" prose piece. I'm ecstatic!

----------------------------------------------

This Week’s Picks
Don’t think..
“As you read this, you reach for your cock and stroke it slowly, in anticipation of our eventual meeting.”

I’ll be out in 2 mins, I’m just brushing my teeth…
“One centimetre at a time, he slid oh so slowly into me and then retreated out again.”

We all have Secrets
“I’ll give you a little reminder - it was when he and his wife were making me cum so hard that I blacked out.”

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Iris Bahr’s Festive World

Editor’s Choice
Letter to a Lover



More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Letter to a Lover

This week I'm posting something a little different from my normal uber-hardcore memoirs. Sometimes I go on stints, when I get into the mood of it, and write supremely poetic words that are deeply rooted from within me.


♥---------------------------♥


Here I can whisper words unheard....



♥---------------------------♥



If I was lying in this bed, my eyes reflecting all the light in the dimly lit room and my mind wandering to places of amorous need, would you come and be the salve to my desires?

If when I moved beneath the covers and more of my skin would be exposed by the shifting sheets and my movement stirred something within you, would you feel what I feel? Could you come to me and cradle me with all you were, your skin touching mine and making a quiet fire between us. Could you make me crave you with just one touch?

I can imagine a moment in time where my body becomes liquid while pondering thoughts of carnal contact and possession and where time seems like just a void; the caress is all that matters. I’m here though, my physical self in need of something I can’t give it alone. I can feel the coolness of the air trying to creep onto my skin while I hide beneath sheltering sheets, my face pressed to the soft mattress.

I can feel you near me, yet you’re not within my grasp and so all is silent around me and my mind presses on. I can hear your steps and the movement of your before bed chores on the other side of the door, it feels like you could be miles away though, yet I can just imagine your mind racing too. I feel I would do anything to be the light that envelopes you in that other room, to be able to be near you and all around you like a second skin and being the one to guide you in the darkness. I stretch and move all by myself, making a grand show of all the contact my skin is receiving from the lifeless pillows I lie sheltered in. A valley of cotton holds my body and feels my touch like a silent sentinel in white.

I close my eyes as I rub the back of my hand across my lips, letting the smallest bit of flesh from the end of my tongue gain access to the outside world. All is slow and the reception of sensory information, my body is a satellite to all the sensation life can produce.

I roll and let my hair spill over my face, a life-filled veil concealing me in sudden darkness and solitude. Here, I can hear my own breathing as if it were the only sound in the void. I whisper slow words to myself that are of no consequence but for my ears to hear. In silence, the world is never truly devoid of sound, it just beats its force of life upon your sensitive ears, letting you know of the pulse beyond your own.

The machine of the body is never quiet.

Every breath here has a purpose in my long wait for you. It may have been minutes or years since I left you to lie in wait in my own skin here in the dark cave of the bed. I can feel my body hum to the very thought of your hand upon me, a small gasp escaping and my body responding with a slow movement that catches me off guard. Even alone you are here, next to my skin.

I can feel the way I do when I can smell your scent and lie in anticipation waiting for a chance to press my lips to the warmth of your skin. I think of all the times and ways you’ve possessed me before but each time gives way to a biting sense of newness and a thrill I can contain only under the guise of a smile. If you could live in my space and feel what I do when you’re under my skin, you would feel the pounding of unheard sounds and the sensation of touches yet to be given.

I become lost and have to remember my body is in the world and not just in my mind; I’m taken out of myself and have to concentrate hard to get back in.

I sigh just for the sound of it and for want of a companion in my waiting. My own breath is my friend while I lie in wait for you.

My body moves in an unhurried movement and my hands seem ripe for investigation; the half light makes them seem unreal and not my own. I try to see myself as the creature you see when you look down upon me, my eyes too large and my mouth too small. I drag my nails down my thighs in punishment for not loving myself as much as I should in the instant I thought of this. If only every moment I spent I could feel what you feel when your eyes meet mine.

I’m getting lonely now thinking of you and the fact that your warm skin isn’t next to mine. My own body has ceased to be enough entertainment and I long for new stimuli. I hear your voice call out to me and I imagine I feel now as someone having their thirst quenched after finding themselves lost in a desert.. I can sense that you’re coming ever nearer.

I grip the sheet for the movement of it while I listen to you making your way toward my haven. I breathe in and forget to let it go for the briefest of seconds but already the action has made me drugged. As the door opens I see your frame silhouetted within the yellow light of the hallway behind it and I think again: it is better to be in this body than to be that light around you, for within this body you can take me and make me yours.


..............

...

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Dirty Words

I love to go to my visitor stat website and look at all the search keywords that led to my site. They can be quite surprising.

Considering the description and tags on this blog, its interesting how nasty and perverted these keywords can get. Its amazing how sometimes I can find that some people are even more perverted than I am. The following is a racked list of keywords, phrases and sentences that led to my site from various search engines:

  • underage
  • petite underage lowers
  • underage teen blogspot
  • underage fuck
  • underage orgasm
  • "Please fuck me the teen moaned as the older man teased her clit with his tongue."
  • sexy underage girls
  • femme fatale sex scene clips
  • bare underage girl in the flesh
  • teen girls touch cocks
  • "Lick me!"
  • fake rape teenage girls
  • squirt urine arouse
  • teen erotic writing
  • ageplay sex fantasy stories
  • "Try my daughter."
  • teddy bear sex
  • teddy bear girls
  • "Naked with teddy bear playtime."
  • corset sex
  • red wet panties
  • wet orgasm
  • "The underage girl cried out as daddy's cock impaled her."
  • 18 years old naked
  • high school girl fucks
  • old man cock suck teen
  • underage ass licking
  • teen girl fellatio
  • "Come for daddy, come on daddy's face."
  • teen sex stories
  • virgin sex
  • virgin teen panties
  • schoolgirl sex panties
  • short skirt slut
  • daddy's big cock
  • ass fuck teenage girl
As you can see, the variation on the theme is very wide and really gets me thinking. Some make me think back to what Ive written (esp the sentence ones) and go, 'Did I write that?'. Lets play scavenger hunt and find where all these pices are found in the site, it may take months to sort it out.

.........
...

Thursday, September 13, 2007

You Want to Sex Me, No?

I realized that it has been since June since I hit up my world of escape and tried to will my passions into word form here for all to read. I know I've said it before, but...I'm back.

I know that some of you have seemingly given up on me but I'm super pumped and filled with fuel to add to the fire of my writing. So what better medium than the safety(?) of my favorite blog space, "Allegory"?

It sometimes gets to me that since I put my life and choices out there for the world to see that Im constantly judged and seemingly used for my writing and the escape it can give those who read it. It becomes a personal endeavor when someones else takes in what your life is and feels a connection to you, they feel a safety in judging and using you up.

I think I needed a little break to clear my head and try to understand what exactly it was that pulled me to sex-blogging in the first place: the fact that I think my experiences are interesting and that typing them all out in the detail my memory holds is therapeutic and helps me not only move on an grow up but also come to terms with the person Ive become.

I know it sounds as if I speak as though my experiences were miles and decades behind me, but its really that I see them as stepping stones to the girl I am today. Its interesting to think that I'm still growing up and see it all from that perspective.

--------------------------------------------------

Ill start my first entry since deciding to come back by answering questions and concerns I received since my drop out:

> Gadget wouldn't be such a problem ... if he and you were more open to 3somes and moresomes. Surprised you haven't had such experiences ... never mind not sharing them.

A: Heres the thing with that (and sorry you think Gadget to be a problem, lol) , the fact that you think I havnt been envolved in threesomes or "moresomes" is just that I havnt written about them....yet. I have had several of these kind of experiences and actually have written about a "moresome" that envolved several other girls a while back. I understand that people are really looking for extremes in sex and sex writing but whereas some writers and websites go for shock value my aim is to just express myself the way I want and the way I see fit to make a semblance of my life in writing. You want more of something? Email me!

> Why do you seem to drop out for a while and ignore us?

A: Its most definatly not intentional and I really love writing and getting responses from readers and communicating my sexual self and getting imput but sometimes my life just catches up with me and I just have to prioritize and most things come before dedicating an hour or two to writing out a memoir. An "A" in my physics class is more important to me than to see how many times I can find a replacement noun for the word "cock". I love my writing and I love my sexual self but life is just so unpredictable. I promise that I do try though.

> You're a pervert.

A: Thank you.

> Whats up with the partially naked pictures and cropped stuff?

A: Theres a really fun answer to that. "A person is only the sum of her parts." In all actuality, I really love to use my camera to capture a mood and a shape to my body that sometimes cant be garnered with a full shot. The way the photos come to be is that I take a full shot and crop it down to my favorite part(s) of it. Though not only is sort of a fun way to use my creativity is also another form of anonymity and a way to be aloof. Why, don't you like a little tease?

> You talk about Gadget like he's a god or something, whats the angle for that?

A: Ive been asked about this a lot and theres no real complete answer for it. When I write about my more amorous activities I really love to pull all the positivity from them and try to show my angle as a happy, vivacious and sexually vigorous chick is interested about love, sex and satisfaction. Why wouldn't a speak positively of a partner who is sexually satisfying and who is dedicated to my happiness and my needs? I don't regard Gadget as a God but as a really interesting and fulfilling partner who I can trust to always be interested in mine and my body's pleasure.

> Why should I read your words?

A: Its not as if I think I need to convince someone to read my writing or be interested, it should really just speak for itself. I feel the draw of my writing is its frankness and imagery and though sometimes somewhat savage on sexual detail, I feel like my writing can be a sexy escape for just about anyone interested in the sexuality of an amorous young female.

> I know you think you're a healthy person, but I think you're severely wounded.

A: Thats a very deep summation for someone to make having never really met or known me. I do think that life has handed me some hard situations but I feel like Ive tried to make the best of them and to build myself up as a coherent and inner mindful being. I have been hurt and I still bare scars but I feel like one must work through hurt in order to gain transcendence and understanding. Also, if you're attributing my sexual hunger to be some sort of unhealthy illness or affliction, I consider you to be severely ill informed.

> I love reading your writing and imagining that such an interesting person really exists.

A: Im was so supremely flattered by this compliment and I really didn't known how to react at first but to the author, I just hope you know that your comment was supremely appreciated! Big kiss!

> This blog is dead.

A: NO IT ISNT! :)

Stay tuned for a new post coming up soon on the delights of sexy phone calls in the middle of tghe night. Big kiss guys, Im so glad to be working on more content for the blog!

.............
...